My wife’s car’s engine strained every time I started moving. Something was wrong – jammed brakes I learnt later (top-tip – don’t drive a car like this as you end up with an expensive repair bill).
It’s a bit like me now. As much as I want to do more, it’s like I’ve got jammed brakes much of the time. I know there’s light at the end of the tunnel – it just takes time to reach the right diagnosis and get the right treatment.
When Rachel, my daughter (picture from 2011), was much younger, she wanted to learn to ride a bike. At the weekend, she’d ask me to go with her to practice. I remember that she’d have that determined look of concentration. She’d push the pedal and try and balance the bike. For a fleeting moment she’d move forward, and I’d wonder if this was the time she’d learn to ride (a moment of excited anticipation). A few seconds later, she’d to have to put her foot on the floor to stop herself toppling. She’d keep at it until she decided she’d had enough for the day (always amazed me how much she took it in her stride).
We did this time and time again. Then one day, it all came together. Suddenly, Rachel could ride a bike. The joy, the excitement. Soon after this, she rode her bike into a lamp post, but that’s another story!
Rachel learning to ride a bike still inspires me to this day. It’s the shear determination and tenacity.
I took my health for granted. Things that were easy are much harder now, as if I’ve got my brakes on. I’m grateful that I can do what I can do. I just want to do more.
But I’m not going to give up. I’m going to keep pushing forward. Okay, I must pace myself. It doesn’t all need to happen in one day. But if I’m sensible, I can do something!
I’ve learnt to never give up. There’s always something you can do to move forward.
Thanks for reading,